Tuesday, December 9, 2008

The road we've traveled pt. 3

**OH MY WORD...these pics are driving me BANANAS!!!!!!! I dont know what is going on, but I have fixed it ump-teen-million times & blogger keeps messing them up. I give up!!

Feb. 08- finished my blood thinners in Feb. and got the OK from both Dr Casey & Dr T to start trying. One of the follow up procedures that we were supposed to do after the surgery was an HSG/dye test. Well, with the cast and then the blood thinners, we put this off. This test checks to be sure that my tubes stayed open after surgery and that my uterus held it's shape. I was scared to DEATH because I had heard that these tests were super painful. But, I barely felt a thing!! The Dr. doing the test didn't say ANYTHING, but the nurse showed me where at least 1 tube was open. I had a follow up with Dr T and he said everything looked fine. He said that part of my uterus had collapsed, so there was 1 tube and 1 side that were BETTER than the other, but that it wasn't a problem. Dr T said to come back in 3 months if we weren't pregnant.
March 08-SPRING BREAK! We went to San Diego with Ben's parents JUST IN TIME for me to ovulate!! We had a great trip & Ben and I had a GREAT time!!! However, nothing happened-not pregnant.

April 08-I cant think of anything memorable. We kept trying, but didn't get pregnant.
May 08-still not pregnant
June 08-we took a vaca. to New Orleans (our week from LAST year's time share). We had more fun than we thought we were going to! (pics tonight) After NOLA, we drove up and spent the last weekend in WM with our dear friends. My mom & sister happened to be there that same weekend. It was fun and Ben and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary in WM that Sunday (in the church that we were married in).

The Quarter House

Honey Island Swamp Tour

Cafe Du Monde

July 08-go back to Dr T at the beginning of the month, he puts me back on 100mg of Clomid and says to come back in 3 months for the sonos and such if I don't get pregnant.
August 08-not pregnant
September 08-I jumped the gun, and called for a day 10 sonogram. We went in and I had five large follicles, but one that was bigger. BUT, I was not ready for the shot, so I made an appt to go back and check the next day. What usually happens is that 1 follicle will take over and grow and rupture while the others reabsorb. So, I go back the next day to find not only did that 1 follicle grow...but the other 4 did as well as one more. That would be SIX GIANT follicles. SIX!?!?!? We thought that for SURE we would get pregnant. It now turned into "how many?" We started praying that we didn't have more than 3. But, nothing happened and we were not pregnant. Dr T wanted to do this same thing for 3 months, but I was impatient and running out of money...
October 08-we went in for the day 10 sono and decided to go straight to an IUI. We had some problems with timing this month, but after SEVERAL sonos, we got it right. Ben made his "drop" and I was "turkey basted" once again. I had 3-4 good follicles this time & Ben's count was great. Timing was perfect. BUT, still not pregnant. This time I was NOT OK. I was a week late. I kept saying "if I can get to Friday I will let myself get excited." I made it through Friday, but started Sat evening. My hopes were already up. I felt like it was a cruel joke. I kept saying "surely God wouldn't do this to me." I KNOW that God has a plan and that it will be perfect in his time...but I am not very patient. I can see God's hand in EVERYTHING, but that doesn't make it easier and hearing that from other people only makes it harder. I was very weepy this month and cried all the way to church one Sunday. After church, we rode the trains downtown and had brunch at the "Iron Cactus" and had a great day together!! It helped!
November 08-Time to take a break! My new job at the counseling agency is supposed to go full time in Jan, at which time I will get insurance. So, I started looking at my co-workers policies and found that IVF would be covered as well as other fertility treatments. I have felt SO guilty over the $$$$$$$$$$$$$ that we have spent all for nothing when we find out we are not pregnant. It seems like such a waste!!
December 08-So, now we wait for insurance! When it kicks in, I will go see Dr. Putman at Baylor who has helped several of my friends to get pregnant. Wont he LOVE getting my over 300 pgs of notes from Dr T!!!!! Even though we have insurance, it will cost us quite a bit! IVF itself is $15,000 and we will have to pay somewhere around 20% of that. PLUS the meds which cost over $1500. We took a HUGE leap financially for me to work where I am now. It turned out to be the blessing that we need...but it has been hard, ESPECIALLY with infertility costing SO STINKING MUCH!!! Hence, the donation on the side of the blog. I plan to copy Lianna and do some giveaways to generate interest & raise a little for our baby fund...I just have to find something to give away!!

Ecclesiastes 3:11

He has made everything beautiful in its time.

with love,


Michelle said...

Thanks for sharing your story. I am so glad to see your faith is strengthened through all you've been through. That's beautiful faith.

Jenny Latshaw said...

WOW again...I will try to see if I find more information out somewhere else in the blog but if I don't can you give us an update on how things are going?

God Bless you! And all the encouragement I will give you is this: I was told 1 week before my wedding (1st marriage) that I would never have kids naturally. My 1st husband took that as a "get out of free card" for having kids even though he swore he wanted kids. We struggled with sex, our marriage, and there were so many times when I thought I was prego because I kept skipping my period for 3 months at a time only to have horrible periods, excruciating and heavy. We have a couple of good years only to end up 8 1/2 years later divorced (all the time never using protection and never having a baby). I went through a hellish year with dating total losers and jerks which sent me into a depression. Then I met Drew my current husband and things weren't perfect but he lifted me up in so many ways. We had decided to live together first because we both had just gone through horrible marriages and divorces. On Feb 22nd at 3am I found out I was prego with a little baby we now call Bailey Bug! This after crying, begging, praying...all in hopes that I would have her. We struggled through the pregnancy and through her birth...and it was all worth it!

I hope that no matter what your marriage and faith continues. You two are truly blessed to have a marriage of faith! With much love and hope...
Jenny (Baughman) Latshaw

Britney K said...

OH my goodness! I just read every bit of your journey. Wow. Girl, yes, His timing is perfect. He also give us the desire of our hearts. I/we are believing that the Lord has the same desire that you do to have children! Praying that he moves mountains ASAP! Bless you guys!

motherknowsless said...

I just finished the three parts to your story. This child, when it arrives, will know he/she was a most wanted baby. Have you had a hysto salpinagram? Just wondering. I posted about miscarriages on my site. You and your husband seem to share a wonderful life. The pork in todays post is making me hungry! Yum!

Living Plan B said...

Thank you for sharing this story. I too walked this awful road during the same time you did. I am still childless. I would love to hear an updated on you.

Thanks again for sharing. It is nice to know others know the pain of this journey.

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